We hear the horrific stories in the media of spousal and child abuse. Abuse can be spiritual, emotional, physical or sexual.
And then there is self abuse.
I believe this form of abuse is just as devastating. Several weeks ago my sister's ex-husband lost his brother to alcoholism. My sister plead for him to stop but his condition worsen. She called for help but it was too late. His liver died from years of drinking and he bleed out.
Self abuse can take on any number of forms like cutting oneself, degrading sexual activities, alcohol or drugs. Or it can take the form of shutting down to the point you don't care and give up - sadly inviting opportunity for people to abuse you - only to see this as a form of punishment because you feel you deserve it.
I remember when a guest speaker told me that I loathed myself. Loath is a strong word for hate. I quietly agreed. I did and said things I regretted and hated living under the shadow of my shame (though God did not see it as such - whenever He forgives - He forgets, Isaiah 43:25).
Loathing is just one of the many roots that are tied to self-abuse. Yes, it's true that some people have done terrible things to another person who had not hated themselves until that moment of violation. Now they recriminate themselves when they did not do anything wrong.
Whatever the cause or reason for self abuse God's remedy is found in Isaiah 42:3. A bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not snuff out. In faithfulness he will bring forth justice (NIV). The tenderness of Christ is very evident in His dealings with the broken to bring healing to the most painful places in the heart. He is patient and kind to help those who have become their own victim. A person who struggles with self-abuse will most likely view God as one of the many who are just out to exploit and take advantage of them.
There is a choice to be made.
Do we believe God really cares about us? Do we believe He cares to help us though we keep doing things to our own destruction? Can we trust a mighty and powerful God to be tender with our bruised hearts and abused bodies?
It takes humility and courage only the Holy Spirit can give to a man or woman who will look away from their condition and say with assurance that God loves and cares for me.
Beloved, as I write this I sense there are many believers who can not say that well quoted Scripture in Romans 8:1 that tells us there is no condemnation in Christ without hating ourselves for failing so miserably. No matter the depths of folly there is a Scripture that has proven to be a great comfort.
Thou hast also given me the shield of thy salvation: and thy right hand hath holden me up, and thy gentleness hath made me great. (Psalms 18:35, KJV).
His gentleness and tenderness makes us greater and stronger than that which wants to bind us. Yes, His tenderness will dissolve the cords of self-hate and give way to freedom to know His love and care.
Right now ask Him to hold you.
His strength is enough to uphold you and His arms gentle so not to crush you.
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